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19 minutes ago, LoongFred said:

Well to do Thais expect to pay. They accept it. Splitting the bill is a western thing. Of course there are situations that might be exceptions but I expect to pay unless with a well off Thai friend. Often at restaurant a senior Thai or their spouse will disappear during the meal and settle the bill so as not giving you a chance to offer to pay. I personally feel bad if I asked friend to go out to eat and they insist on paying, but I've learned to accept it. We find other ways to show gratitude.

Good for you.

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6 minutes ago, Marc26 said:

They have live cover bands 

Actually I think there is fantastic live music all over Thailand 

From English cover bands, Thai cover bands and original bands

The "big" town we go to near my wife's village, Singburi

Has all kinds of great open air pubs with live music 

I used to frequent Zab bar at the start of W/St Pattaya. It came under new ownership and suddenly there was no corner that the new owner could not cut.

It started with a big "Elvis" band complete with Jordanaires. It also had 3 girls dancing on a plinth, and another 3 playing fiddles on a plinth. First the dancing girls were scrapped. Then the Fiddlers. Then the band. Eventually all that was left was Elvis and a Karaoke box. Audiences plumetted, so Elvis also had to go.

He was re[;aced by a "Bee Gee" tribute band. Within days it was "Bee G", and eventually, just "Be". Same result.

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15 minutes ago, Vince said:

I hate to admit that I find most cover bands slightly unpleasant. Not only do they cover slightly dreadful songs they do so less than perfectly. 

I would rather listen to a recorded jazz session than some live bands doing a cover of "freebird" or "hotel California". 

But agreed on over amplified music being a turn off - live or recorded. 

The musicianship I find acceptable, though it is only copy-copy and rarely innovative. But then again, most of these players are scratching a living and hoping for good tips. Not superstars, but honest journeymen.

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5 minutes ago, JohninDublin said:

I used to frequent Zab bar at the start of W/St Pattaya. It came under new ownership and suddenly there was no corner that the new owner could not cut.

It started with a big "Elvis" band complete with Jordanaires. It also had 3 girls dancing on a plinth, and another 3 playing fiddles on a plinth. First the dancing girls were scrapped. Then the Fiddlers. Then the band. Eventually all that was left was Elvis and a Karaoke box. Audiences plumetted, so Elvis also had to go.

He was re[;aced by a "Bee Gee" tribute band. Within days it was "Bee G", and eventually, just "Be". Same result.

This is our favorite place in Singburi Thailand 

The local big town 

 

Big outdoor place with good Thai food and great local music 

 

https://www.google.com/search?q=i+oon+cafe+singburi&client=ms-android-bell-ca-revc&source=android-browser&ei=0ufkYbb3Cdi70PEP_7aouAs&oq=i+oon+cafe+singburi&gs_lcp=ChNtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1zZXJwEAMyBwghEAoQoAE6BwgAEEcQsAM6CgguEMcBEK8BEA06BAgAEA06BggAEA0QCjoICAAQCBANEB46BggAEA0QHjoICAAQDRAFEB46CggAEAgQDRAKEB46BQghEKABOggIIRAWEB0QHjoECCEQFUoECEEYAFDJB1j_PWC-QmgCcAF4AIABlgGIAdYIkgEDNC42mAEAoAEByAEIwAEB&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-serp#wptab=si:AHuW2sQx2XVXvXAeA2ZxJrerbx_iaXnGNgRmQO8h0PSOe7ZLNCLcwvwi8yZkxmwWEFdbwT7mRKLK8rssQ5wb5dfHGVESHonw5Cmfo3WbeEg0gd46wWyTIx7L09T561Tm_aq3YgkAMwIyoTG8Mii1wmH8FnWU8Sw-gECW4ejQD0-oeMWDXZ_RqQjZcRnZq10vth9_wWEadjdT

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13 minutes ago, Marc26 said:

I agree with that for the most part

And by the way, that occurs in most countries and cultures

But, and just like any country, people take advantage and some aren't appreciative as well

My wife pays for most things for her family, as I do as well for my family 

But there are times, in normal settings where a couple of her brothers will expect her to pay for trivial shit like gas, that bite her ass

I have 6 nephew's, all in their 20's

I'm paying for them when we are out 90% of the time

I want to and it's my pleasure 

But they often have not said Thank You

Over Xmas they came over to our hotel 

I spent 250usd on takeout

I shouldn't have to remind someone in their 20's to say thank you 

Another one....

My wife helps our her Aunt, not with huge money but money here and there. Plus we've given good sums of money to her daughter for tuition and such 

Her Aunt sent her a "joking" text or it may have been a call, that my wife forgot to give her a New Year's gift of money 

Why do that? It made my wife feel bad, towards a person she is happy to help out

I have a (well to do) friend with an overseas (not Thai) wife. I won't go into the details but he did and said things that made sense to him, but which may have appeared to be "big money" displays to his (poorer overseas) relatives in my opinion. He complained they expect him to contribute significantly. 

I said to him that he may have inadvertently shamed them into a position where they couldn't reciprocate or chip in without losing face, so they just let him "take over".  I was just guessing of course. 

Does this seem possible? Is there a way to not look like the big money guy and have shared expenses? 

I've heard relatives sometimes make zero or low interest loans to each other. Is this appropriate? 

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12 hours ago, Alavan said:

For the moment I prefer the restaurants in Kathu. 9th Floor in Patong was a bit expensive but the best. In Kathu Cassita Rossa is a good Italian, also pizza, Tong Dee good Western kitchen with also some Thai food, Sunday roast.
Tung Tong (big chicken) good and cheap Thai and Issan food. For seafood the best is Kan Eang @ Pier. In Patong I always go to Savoey as they know me for nearly 30 years.

Good seafood tips thanks. Know both places of old too. Spoiled for good Italian eateries. Da Mario (Karon), Roma (Patong), Vivorosso (Rawai) & Pomodoro (Kata).

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13 hours ago, Alavan said:

You can play Red Mountain whenever you want. As it is so expensive nearly nobody plays it. Greenfee 6000. If you play with a member of Loch Palm you will get 1000 Baht discount.
Ad to that the compulsary golf cart (700) without which you can't play, caddy fee and caddy tip.

Won’t play just check out the empty clubhouse and scenery , maybe have beer and chat to the two members !

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19 hours ago, Rain said:

Phuket and environs - circa 1969.

Yea, I was in Phuket then and it was a quiet and friendly. I remember having dinner on a pier at a place called " New Lucky Cafe " I think that's the name and it was very good.  No or few tourists and few falangs.

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On 1/15/2022 at 11:38 PM, Soidog said:

So you are a Thai then? Not an expat. Must be hard for you 

Avoidance is not too hard. It's about making choices. I too am done like being called an "expat" because it seems to be a term imposed on us by the Brits. Being referred to as a falang, falang American or American is fine. I'm proudly not something else. 

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4 hours ago, oldschooler said:

Won’t play just check out the empty clubhouse and scenery , maybe have beer and chat to the two members !

vew from the clubhouse on 18 par 5

thailand 2010 020.jpg

thailand 2010 017.jpg

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On 1/16/2022 at 3:36 PM, JamesR said:

Yes, what you said above is what I have been seeing for years.

The longest I have stayed in one stretch is one year, the average is six months but this goes back over a 34 year period.

I know and have mixed with Thais from various social groups in Thailand from the rich and educated to the average so I have a broad knowledge of how the society is. (And the corruption).

I did think of retiring when I was around 50 to Thailand but leaving my assets etc back in the Uk, after three months of walking on the beach etc it soon dawned on me that was not possible due to it becoming boring.

The best thing for me is when ready to retire then just retire, not retire to Thailand or anywhere, but just retire from work and then travel as you please. 

But I will leave my property and assets in the UK as the rules can change in Thailand at anytime and as we have no rights or security then we are not really expats or actually retired there, we are just on one year visa extensions.

I have met people as you say who sold up in the UK and I thought I know what will happen in a few years time to you, you will be stuck in some cheap village in the middle of nowhere in Isaan or some place as that is all you can afford after spending the bulk of the money and will slowly become a moaner.

I met one bloke while having a beer, he said you lot come here, you bring your two week money and the prices go up making it hard for us, we can't afford these prices, I thought that is not my fault. 

And the number of farangs I have met crying into their beer due to having met am Isaan bar girl, buying her a house, car etc and then her doing a runner with everything is quite common, I stay well away from that sort. 

Spot on comments there mate. The last paragraph about people crying in to their beer for the reasons you say is all too common. Then of course there are those (a number on this forum in fact) who try at every stage to talk up life in Thailand. Who attack anyone who dares to make any comment that highlights something wrong or negative about the place. They take offence as you are pricking their conscience about their poor life choices.  
 

 

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On 1/16/2022 at 9:44 PM, JamesR said:

I am looking outside the window now and it is blue skies and sunny, it is January.

So why are you talking about Thailand? Why do you want out of such a great place? I'm from California with great weather but I still think Thailand is better. Those who come from only a  few months have reasons and it's better than back home. I prefer to  come and stay, but it means learning a lot and  being able to adapt, Some people can and are happy. Others can't and only complain. 

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2 minutes ago, ramubond said:
On 1/16/2022 at 4:21 AM, Soidog said:

Oh ok, I do a very similar thing. I don’t like to generalise, but I know the kind of people you mean. Only thing I would say is this…..  Its one thing to come and go and see Thailand as a place for an extended holiday. A place that although you may have invested much, you haven’t fully committed your life to the place only to find things change around you. Remember that some of these guys have no easy way to return to their home country. They sold up years ago, moved their whole life to the place they thought was their future life, only for it to turn sour on them. A return “home” for many would mean living in a rented apartment with a very tight budget and the prospect of Northern European winters. 
 

Many of these guys were not particularly well travelled or experienced in other cultures. They came to Thailand for holidays. Spent the day chilling on the beach and the evenings partying. You can’t do that 365 days a year when you live in Thailand. It’s either too expensive, too boring, or both. When you settle in a foreign country and live a “normal life”, that’s when the shortcomings and differences of culture come in to stark contrast. That’s when you start to notice the things that frustrate you and the whole thing snowballs. 
 

I always tell anyone thinking of getting fully committed to Thailand to stop and think. If they still think it’s a great idea, they should stop and think again! For many, the exact opposite is the outcome of their move. It’s a dream come true, often with the love of their life and in a culture that sits well with their underlying character. 

well stated.....soidog i assume...my first day on chat still learning to navigate

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On 1/17/2022 at 10:25 AM, Marc26 said:

I agree with that for the most part

And by the way, that occurs in most countries and cultures

But, and just like any country, people take advantage and some aren't appreciative as well

My wife pays for most things for her family, as I do as well for my family 

But there are times, in normal settings where a couple of her brothers will expect her to pay for trivial shit like gas, that bite her ass

I have 6 nephew's, all in their 20's

I'm paying for them when we are out 90% of the time

I want to and it's my pleasure 

But they often have not said Thank You

Over Xmas they came over to our hotel 

I spent 250usd on takeout

I shouldn't have to remind someone in their 20's to say thank you 

Another one....

My wife helps our her Aunt, not with huge money but money here and there. Plus we've given good sums of money to her daughter for tuition and such 

Her Aunt sent her a "joking" text or it may have been a call, that my wife forgot to give her a New Year's gift of money 

Why do that? It made my wife feel bad, towards a person she is happy to help out

I had a Thai friend years ago that explained to me:

How do you feel when you help others? If it makes you feel good to help you need to thank the other person for allowing you to do good and help. It sounded weird but I always remember. So don't worry and be content that you did a good thing.

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3 hours ago, Soidog said:

Spot on comments there mate. The last paragraph about people crying in to their beer for the reasons you say is all too common. Then of course there are those (a number on this forum in fact) who try at every stage to talk up life in Thailand. Who attack anyone who dares to make any comment that highlights something wrong or negative about the place. They take offence as you are pricking their conscience about their poor life choices.  
 

Not really but those who find fault with everything are never going to be happy in Thailand or anywhere else. Professional whiners I guess. Try to see the good in things and it will make you a happy person.

People need to be culturally adaptive to successfully live here. 

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On 1/17/2022 at 3:17 AM, LoongFred said:

Well to do Thais expect to pay. They accept it. Splitting the bill is a western thing. Of course there are situations that might be exceptions but I expect to pay unless with a well off Thai friend. Often at restaurant a senior Thai or their spouse will disappear during the meal and settle the bill so as not giving you a chance to offer to pay. I personally feel bad if I asked friend to go out to eat and they insist on paying, but I've learned to accept it. We find other ways to show gratitude.

That is why I said it is not the norm for farangs to pay just because they are farangs as stated in the original comment. 

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Bangla has been as busy as ever. Few stoppages here and there with the odd covid panic but thankfully people seem to be treating omicron as the very mild bug it is now.

We all caught it on bangla one night, I basically had the sh*ts for a night 🤣 and was fine the next day. Nothing an immodium washed down with chang won't sort out, put it that way. 

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4 hours ago, ramubond said:
On 1/15/2022 at 9:21 PM, Soidog said:

Oh ok, I do a very similar thing. I don’t like to generalise, but I know the kind of people you mean. Only thing I would say is this…..  Its one thing to come and go and see Thailand as a place for an extended holiday. A place that although you may have invested much, you haven’t fully committed your life to the place only to find things change around you. Remember that some of these guys have no easy way to return to their home country. They sold up years ago, moved their whole life to the place they thought was their future life, only for it to turn sour on them. A return “home” for many would mean living in a rented apartment with a very tight budget and the prospect of Northern European winters. 
 

Many of these guys were not particularly well travelled or experienced in other cultures. They came to Thailand for holidays. Spent the day chilling on the beach and the evenings partying. You can’t do that 365 days a year when you live in Thailand. It’s either too expensive, too boring, or both. When you settle in a foreign country and live a “normal life”, that’s when the shortcomings and differences of culture come in to stark contrast. That’s when you start to notice the things that frustrate you and the whole thing snowballs. 
 

I always tell anyone thinking of getting fully committed to Thailand to stop and think. If they still think it’s a great idea, they should stop and think again! For many, the exact opposite is the outcome of their move. It’s a dream come true, often with the love of their life and in a culture that sits well with their underlying character. 

Why commit ourselves to any country?

Plus we can not commit our lives to Thailand anyway as farangs are only allowed a yearly visa extension, that could change at anytime.

 

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On 1/17/2022 at 3:25 AM, Marc26 said:

I agree with that for the most part

And by the way, that occurs in most countries and cultures

But, and just like any country, people take advantage and some aren't appreciative as well

My wife pays for most things for her family, as I do as well for my family 

But there are times, in normal settings where a couple of her brothers will expect her to pay for trivial shit like gas, that bite her ass

I have 6 nephew's, all in their 20's

I'm paying for them when we are out 90% of the time

I want to and it's my pleasure 

But they often have not said Thank You

Over Xmas they came over to our hotel 

I spent 250usd on takeout

I shouldn't have to remind someone in their 20's to say thank you 

Another one....

My wife helps our her Aunt, not with huge money but money here and there. Plus we've given good sums of money to her daughter for tuition and such 

Her Aunt sent her a "joking" text or it may have been a call, that my wife forgot to give her a New Year's gift of money 

Why do that? It made my wife feel bad, towards a person she is happy to help out

Try not handing out any money at all and you will become immediately unpopular. 

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On 1/17/2022 at 6:28 AM, JohninDublin said:

Came across this: 

Good video.

As usual there are more people walking than actually drinking and there are as usual only a few people drinking, some bars looks busy as most of the people there are 'staff'. 

I wonder how long the street will last before being turned into hotels and shops as happened over the years to the many girly bar streets coming off of Soi Bangla, the area has only 10% of the bars it used to have.

Which is a good thing.

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On 1/16/2022 at 11:52 AM, oldschooler said:

Talking about those farang who are somewhat accomplished, wealthy or comfortable, with expanded open minds & rounded life experience , with rational conservative views vs. the dull desparate socialist thick semi -skilled uneducated bar / rest. operator types, all with equally thick Isaan ex bar girl wives, of whom I’ve had a belly full around my area during Covid.

Move to an expensive area, one in which uneducated people with their ex-bars girls can not afford, why did you live in their area in the first place?

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On 1/17/2022 at 6:23 AM, LoongFred said:

Avoidance is not too hard. It's about making choices. I too am done like being called an "expat" because it seems to be a term imposed on us by the Brits. Being referred to as a falang, falang American or American is fine. I'm proudly not something else. 

It is true for another reason not to be called expats, you are just farangs there, there are no genuine expats as no one is on a permanent visa, just annual visa extensions.

You can have a longer visa for 5, 10, 20 years but only if you buy one for 500k or 1mill baht, but that is still a temporary visa.

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5 hours ago, ramubond said:

well stated.....soidog i assume...my first day on chat still learning to navigate

Welcome to the forum. Just like everywhere in life, you are likely to meet all kinds on here 😂😂

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